Over the next few weeks, I’m going to write a number of posts to give you some tools you can use to begin to identify your passions.
I meet so many people that tell me they are ready to make a change in their life, but have no idea where to start. They may have more than one interest that is pulling them in different directions or they have found they have gotten so far off track, they are having a hard time identifying something they are passionate about.
Not only is this topic an important focus of life coaching, I believe it’s an essential part of health and wellness as well. Our passions feed our spirit. They give us joy, happiness, fulfillment and inspiration. They motivate us and give us something to look forward to in our day or week.
When passion is missing in our life, we look for that satisfaction and fulfillment in other places – food, alcohol, television, relationships and even work. All of these things are not “unhealthy” in themselves, but when they are used to numb our real feelings or ignore a larger issue, then they become unhealthy, sometimes to the point of addiction.
I’ve found over the years that at the root of most people’s eating or weight issues there is usually something deeper. The people that come to see me either already know this, or they don’t realize they are unhappy until we begin to work through the constructs they have designed to avoid dealing with their true feelings.
In both cases, what is often missing is a deeper sense of joy and fulfillment. This is something we cannot get from external sources. It comes from within, when we are connected to our passion and our authentic nature.
It’s important to remember that there is nothing wrong with you if you find yourself in this situation. Don’t beat yourself up for not having figured it out. This is part of the journey, part of your growth as a human being. In our society, very few of us have had the benefit as young children to witness healthy emotional behavior. We are often not taught how to express our feelings, or even recognize them.
Over several posts, I’m going to share with you some clues that will help you to narrow down and identify your passions. They are all around you. Your true self is always trying to steer you in the direction of joy and fulfillment, it’s a just a matter of learning how to notice the signs. These signs are almost always linked to your emotions.
So here’s clue #1: Pay attention to what or who you are jealous of.
We’ve been taught that jealousy is a negative emotion. But really all of our emotions are signs that something is coming up for us. Jealousy is a sign that there is something the other person has that we want – whether that be a lifestyle, a job, a good figure, a relationship, etc. The key is not to focus on the object of our jealousy and steam about how unfair life is. You have to use the emotional clue to notice that this is an issue for you and something you have to pay attention to. In order to have the thing you are jealous or envious of, you will have to do the work yourself. Understand that if this wasn’t personally connected to you in some way, you would not be jealous.
I will share with you my own example. When I was working in the corporate world, I was always noticing stories of entrepreneurs. People who left their jobs and followed their passion. They got to work on their own terms and do what they loved and get paid for it. I so wanted their life. I wasn’t however, jealous of successful CEO’s or lawyers or doctors or concert pianists. These things didn’t have an emotional charge for me. That is the key: emotional charge. This is one way that we know we are connecting to our true self. Any time emotions are involved, we need to notice them and watch for the clues.
The trick is not to stay focused on the emotion of jealousy. Notice what it is showing you and then let it go. If you want that life, thing, job etc., you have to realize that this person has done the work to get it. The process for taking action is more than I can get into in one post, but I hope that in noticing some of your feelings you will be able to start to identify some potential areas for you to look into. Journaling can be very helpful here.
Many people live their entire lives half-living. They run on autopilot, never taking the time to explore and honor who they are and what they came here to experience. If you’re at a place in your life right now where you feel a sense of frustration, or boredom, or desire for something different, honor that feeling and begin the process of self discovery. It may require a bit of effort (anything worth having always does), but the reward of living each day truly happy and fulfilled is so worth it.
Start paying attention to this first clue, and I’ll share more in the coming posts.
To your health and happiness,
Victoria
