Are you ready for change?

by Victoria Joanna on January 28, 2010

in Coaching, Inspiration, Wellbeing

iStock_000010056970Small

As a wellness and life coach, I get to help people create change and transform their lives.  This is my passion.  I get such joy from seeing the physical and emotional transformation that takes place when my clients create the life they imagine for themselves.  Perhaps it’s also my own experience of changing my life that drives me to help others experience the same feeling of freedom and fulfillment.

While I wish I could spread this feeling to everyone, the reality is that not everyone is ready for change.  At least not in this present moment, and the present moment is all that matters.

I often meet individuals that inquire about my services or are curious about life coaching and seem genuinely interested working with me, and then they don’t call me back for months.  Are they afraid of change?  Perhaps.  Are they procrastinating?  Maybe.  Are they ready to make a change? Probably not.

Here’s the thing.  Fear will always exist.  So will the list of reasons why this is not the best time in your life to do the thing you want to do.  Until you are ready, you’re not ready.  It’s as simple as that.

Whether it’s changing your diet or starting an exercise routine, changing jobs or careers, moving to another country, or leaving the comfort and security of a familiar relationship; there is always going to be an aspect of fear and discomfort associated with making any type of significant change in your life.

The point in time at which you finally take action, is the moment where the pain and discomfort of staying where you are is greater than the pain and fear of moving forward.

Often we think that someone who has done something we can’t imagine doing ourselves has more courage than we do.  That somehow they must not have experienced the same fears, doubts and obstacles that we are experiencing.  This is an illusion and couldn’t be further from the truth.

The old adage really applies here:

Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to act in spite of it.

Whatever situation you find yourself in right now.  If you’ve been putting off taking the next step, whatever that may be for you, don’t be too hard on yourself.   Understand that for whatever reason, you were not or are not ready yet.

But also remember this, the process of change always starts on the inside before you can begin to take visible steps on the outside.  Be patient with yourself and also know that you don’t need to take drastic steps immediately, simply begin to do the work on yourself and the transformation will happen.

If you find yourself at a point where you’re not sure if you should take the next step, here are some things to ask yourself:

  • Does the thought of your situation not changing feel almost unbearable?
  • Does the thought of things staying exactly the same scare you more than the though of the unknown?
  • Do you often find yourself frustrated by your present circumstances?
  • Have you been feeling particularly sad, unhappy, tired, or unmotivated for an extended period of time?
  • Do you look forward to the end of the week and dread the beginning of a new one?
  • Whatever roadblock to change may be in your mind, if that didn’t exist, would you do it?

Remember that you don’t have to do it alone.  There are resources and support all around you, including friends, family, coaches, counselors, books, conferences, support groups, mastermind groups and even online groups.  The people and resources that can help you will change as you move through the process, just start somewhere and the rest of your path will unfold.

To your health and happiness,

Victoria

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Do Calories Matter?

by Victoria Joanna on January 20, 2010

in Nutrition, Weight Loss

Tape Measure next to Nutrition FactsGiven that most of us are focused on weight loss during this time of year, I’m going to devote the next couple of posts to this topic.

It continues to amaze me how much misinformation there is on this topic.   It’s something I am very passionate about because I spent most of my teens and early twenties on diets or periods of calorie restriction.  So when I meet with women that are frustrated, disillusioned and confused by their countless attempts to lose weight, it makes me more determined to get the right information out there.

As you’ve heard me say in a previous post, we really need to eliminate the weight loss mentality from our vocabulary.    And I’m happy to say, the shift is happening.  There is definitely more awareness about the benefits of eating healthy, and the ineffectiveness of fad diets and quick-fix gimmicks.

Having said that, there is still some confusion and conflicting information.  One topic that always sparks debate is the need for calorie counting.  I’m sure you’ve heard people say things like “as long as you’re eating healthy food, calories don’t matter” or on the opposite end know of successful programs that are based points and pre-set meals etc that do limit your total daily intake.  I’ve also met many people who say to me “I’m eating healthy and still gaining weight, why is that?”  In fact, I’ve experienced this last one myself!

So do calories matter?  Yes and no.

Not what you wanted to hear right?  Unfortunately the answer isn’t that simple.

From a weight loss perspective, the science behind losing weight is quite straightforward.  In order for your body to lose 1lb of fat, it takes a 3500-calorie deficit.  So if you do the math, this means you need to reduce about 500 calories a day to lose 1lb in a week.  On a side note ladies – this is the reason for the 2lbs a week average!  This means that any diet, cleanse or program promising more than that is going to be mostly water weight.  (Don’t get me wrong, I think cleansing is very important in managing overall health, but it should never be done solely as a means of quick weight loss – watch out for any cleanse that promises quick and significant weight loss as one of it’s key selling features)

Even with the math above, weight loss is more complex than simple “calories-in and calories-out”.   Our bodies are not simply “caloric bank accounts”.   They are more like a science lab of chemical activities that rely on specific nutrients in order to function properly.  More and more research is indicating the complex function of hormones within the body that affect our hunger, satiety and ultimately our metabolism.

Therefore the quality of calories consumed is extremely important.  This is why a strict calorie counting approach does not work in the long term.  It may have worked in your twenties, but over-time if you are not consuming sufficient nutrients, or feeding your body poor quality, processed, nutrient-deficient foods, your metabolism will eventually begin to slow down.

So what’s the best approach?  A healthy diet comprised of whole foods combined with portion control.

If you eat mainly whole foods, you will automatically be consuming food that is nutrient dense and also lower in calories.  This means you are eating more food, more often and not as hungry as you would be on a typical diet.  The high quality food is also fueling your body’s physiological function, which means a revved-up metabolism!

Portion control is important because it keeps the amount of food you consume in check.   Due to yo-yo dieting, skipping meals, over-sized restaurant portions and so forth, most of us have no idea what a typical serving or portion size should look like or what it feels like to eat a meal until we’re 85% full.   Following portion control will help you eat within a healthy caloric range until your natural hunger and satiety responses return and your body gets used to eating at regular intervals in moderate amounts.

From my experience, the easiest foods to over-consume are carbohydrates (whole grains) and fats (nuts and seeds, oils).  So here are a few guidelines to get you started, but first a quick note – these numbers are general parameters, the total number of servings will vary based on your goals, size and activity level.

1 serving of grains (rice, quinoa, oats, etc) is ½ cup.    For reference 1 cup is about the size of a baseball.  You can have anywhere from 2-4 servings of grains per day.  So for the average female, that means 1 cup of oats in the morning plus ½ cup of quinoa at lunch would be your 3 servings of grains for the day.  The rest of your carbohydrates should come from fruits and vegetables.

1 serving of fats is approx 10-12 nuts (1/2 a handful) or 1 tbsp of oil or ¼ of an avocado.  Aim for 2-3 servings of quality fats per day.  One of the biggest weight loss mistakes I see is people snacking on trail mix all day.  While it is a healthier option than chocolate bars and chips, both nuts and dried fruit are extremely nutrient dense so those calories can really add up!  Be sure to divide your servings and take a small container to work.

In both my personal and professional experience, I have found this to be the easiest and most effective approach to healthy, effective and most importantly… permanent weight loss.    I hope you find these tips helpful!

To your health and happiness,

Victoria

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Make 2010 your best year yet!

by Victoria Joanna on December 26, 2009

in Coaching, Inspiration

2010 sparks and fireworks

I’m writing this post from the beaches of beautiful, sunny Punta Cana.

It’s been raining for 2 days now (so much for the sunny part), but I’m taking advantage of the weather to sit under the palapa and get some work done.  There’s a bright side to everything right!

Going down south during the holidays has become a tradition for my fiancée and I.  The first year that we took our trip, we had no intention of making a tradition out of it, but it ended up being such a fantastic way to spend the holidays and start a new year that we were hooked.

For us, coming here is so much more than escaping the snow or having somewhere to celebrate the New Year’s festivities. Though, believe it or not it is also a great way to spend Christmas.  We have found that slowing down and being present every day really allows us to enjoy the holidays with one another.  But ultimately, this is truly our time to re-set, re-energize and plan for the year ahead.  It allows us time to reflect on all of our accomplishments and everything that we’ve experienced over the past 12 months.   Most of all, it’s the most precious two weeks we have alone together, with no interruptions and workplace emergencies.  For two ambitious and focused professionals, this is a rare thing and so we are very conscious to enjoy every minute.

On our first trip, we put our goals in writing – our intentions for the year, not just resolutions which tend to be fleeting and short-lived.  We were amazed at how many of them we achieved when reading them the following year.  I was hooked!   I had written goals before, but at different points of the year, very casually, and without a clear ritual.  Now it’s no longer a 5-minute exercise that we complete and put on the shelf.  For us, this annual vacation has become a ritual.

Every  year we have consistently achieved our goals, moreso than ever before and I do believe that we owe it partly to the conscious goal planning we have implemented.  I want to share with you how you can do the same.  And you don’t need a beach or elaborate vacation either – just a pen, paper and some quiet time to focus and get clear on what you want.   Create a ritual of your own – pick a day during the holidays where you can have some time to yourself – whether that be on the Dec 31st or on Jan 1st (as close to New Year’s as possible).  Base it around something you enjoy.  It could be a bath, candles, soothing music, or starting your day with a coffee or a few hours at Chapters.  Get yourself into the mindset of intention and gratitude.

New Year's Resolutions List

Once you’ve created the ritual, here are the specific strategies for creating a roadmap that is sure to generate momentum for your life and a spectacular 2010:

1.  Start with gratitude.

Before you even start to think about everything you want to happen for you in the year ahead, begin with being grateful for what you already have received.   Being grateful changes your energy.  It allows you to be open to receiving.  If you are only focused on the next thing you want, you are always in a state of chasing and wanting.   Furthermore, at a most basic level, how can you expect to be blessed with more good things if you can’t appreciate what you already have?  I recommend journaling about the year that just passed.   Review the last 12 months in your mind and acknowledge and write down everything great that has happened, both the planned goals and the surprises, as well as the challenges that turned out to be important gifts and lessons.  You will be amazed at how much you have to be thankful for and also how much you have to celebrate.  We often take very little time to celebrate our own accomplishments.  We’re so busy planning that we are off to the next thing and missing the blessings that are being given to us at every turn.  There is no better mindset in which to begin a new year than with the gratitude and realization that your life is already pretty great and only getting better!

2.  Write it down.

This is extremely important.  Less than 3% of people write down their goals.  Yet consider this…. When you read stories of extremely successful people who have done big, remarkable things and made an impact socially or professionally, many of them had at one point written down their big impossible fantasies on paper.  This is something I’ve consistently found over and over again.  And if you consider that less than 5% of the population occupies the highest income brackets, or the highest executive positions and most successful businesses, etc., you start to make the connection that if you want different results from what you currently have, you’re going to have to do something differently, something that most other people aren’t doing.   Some might tell you it’s a waste of time, but be sure to look at their results and ask yourself if they are what you want.  If not, you might want to listen to a different role model.  Just a thought….

3.  Set clear and effective goals.

I believe there is an important distinction between goals and resolutions.  Language is very important, especially to our subconscious.  Resolutions are associated with failed attempts and short-lived commitment.  They imply that something is “wrong” with us and we need to “resolve” to fix it.   Goals on the other hand are proactive, positive and disciplined.  We set goals and we create a plan to achieve them.  With resolutions, we say them once at the beginning of the year and then hope for the best.  They also often have a negative connotation.   For example, you can resolve to quit smoking or you can have a goal of being healthy and being able to run a 10K race, which is more motivating?

There’s a bit of an artform to setting goals – many of you may have heard of SMART goals.  These are based on proven strategies that increase the likelihood of success.  Here are some of those guidelines that I’ve found to be most effective:

  • Be clear and specific. Your goals should be specific enough that you can measure them.  For example, “to be more happy” or “have more balance” is too vague.  How will you know you’ve achieved it?  Most of us actually don’t achieve what we want because we don’t know what we want!  At least not with great clarity.  You need to define what happiness and balance means to you – is that time for a hobby, time with your family, more time with friends or maybe figuring out your passions?
  • Have a deadline. Goals without a timeline are simply wishes and dreams.  When we set a date we automatically make the goals more real in our minds and create a sense of urgency both consciously and subconsciously.
  • Think big. Your goals must be motivating and I mean REALLY motivating!  Most of us set goals with our heads, more like a “to do” list for ourselves rather than dreams that we want to accomplish.  As a result, our so-called “willpower” starts to fade within a few weeks.  To do lists are great and necessary, but they contain the “how” not the “what”.  For the start a new year do this:  PICK 5 GOALS.  That’s it.   Here’s something that works really well for me – it’s a strategy I learned from Robin Sharma and I have found to be very effective.  Ask yourself: What 5 things need to happen this year to make it the best year ever? You can still have smaller goals and monthly objectives if you like but I found this to be a great way to thing big, get focused and get clear.  Remember to set a date for each and ideally write them at the front page of your daily notebook, that way you have a constant reminder.

Every year we start the year with the best of intentions.   Who doesn’t want to improve their life in some way?  Whether that be getting fitter, being healthier, getting the dream job, dream house, dream mate, or achieving a long-time goal such as traveling to a particular country or running a marathon.

As we start a new year and a new decade, make a promise to yourself that this year really will be the best year yet!   Start by approaching the usual New Year’s “resolution-making” a little differently this year.    I hope that these strategies will be helpful and I’ll be sure to keep providing content through my blog, newsletter and programs that will keep you motivated and on track all year long.

I wish you a prosperous 2010!

To your health and happiness,

Victoria

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The biggest weight loss mistake

by Victoria Joanna on December 1, 2009

in Nutrition, Weight Loss

88386687The dieting season is fast approaching. Here are some statistics for you to think about:

• More than 70% of woman are currently on a diet
• Over 95% of dieters regain the weight within 1-3 years

As a nutritionist, many of the clients that come to see me have weight loss as one of their primary goals. Yes, as much as health and disease prevention should be our motivation, the reality is that most of us women just want to fit into our favorite jeans!

While I do believe that a lasting approach to weight loss is actually grounded in healthy eating principles rather than “dieting” restrictions, I know that often the external results are a more immediate incentive than the health of our insides. I’m no different, as a woman I do care about my external appearance and so I relate to my clients who come to see me with an issue that many of them have been struggling with for years.

Of course we all want to be healthy, but how we feel about our bodies is reflected in our self-esteem, self-confidence and the energy we project out into the world. Therefore I think it’s important that we strive to get our bodies to a size (and this is different for everyone) where we are comfortable in our skin and no longer obsess about weight loss.

This often involves dealing with the external weight but also our internal belief systems and mindset. Many of us have been on a dieting roller coaster for so many years that we’ve lost a healthy perspective, which makes it even more difficult to approach weight loss in a healthy and permanent way.

I’ve been there too. I’ve tried every diet. Lost weight and gained weight. I can relate to the women I see every day and this is what fuels my passion for what I do. I want women to once and for all get off the dieting rollercoaster!

Of all the myths and mistakes I see around weight loss, I believe the number one mistake women make is going for the fast and drastic solution. I continue to by surprised by the number of women that still believe avoiding carbohydrates or extreme calorie restriction is the solution (I won’t name names, but many of you know which diets I’m talking about). The reality is that 95% of these women gain all of the weight back, and often more.

I think for many people, their rationale is that they need something quick so they can see results and feel better. And then once they lose the weight, they will just maintain it in a health way.

Here’s the problem with this strategy: you can’t maintain an unrealistic weight loss.

If you have drastically reduced your calories, limited carbs or fruit, etc you have also reset your body’s physiology and metabolism. As a result, when you go back to “normal and healthy” eating your body can actually gain weight.

Not only do you gain the weight back, every time you go on this kind of diet you actually lower your metabolism. This makes it harder and harder to lose weight with each subsequent attempt! This is NOT the effect you want. As women we are already battling a declining metabolism as we age, the last thing you want to do is amplify this process.

The solution: a healthy holistic approach to weight loss. This includes eating the right whole foods at the right times, avoiding processed food and chemicals and taking the right supplements to round out your diet and maximize your nutritional status.

You should be able to maintain your eating habits for life, if that’s not the case, you are probably not on the right program. A holistic approach also addresses potential digestive issues, and hormonal or systemic imbalances which make weight loss easier. Once your body is functioning optimally, your metabolism naturally kicks in.

It is truly the best strategy for a permanent healthy weight. And the bonus: lasting health and disease prevention. ☺

To your health and happiness,

Victoria

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Finding Your Passion – Clue #1

by Victoria Joanna on November 25, 2009

in Coaching, Inspiration, Personal Development

79366125Over the next few weeks, I’m going to write a number of posts to give you some tools you can use to begin to identify your passions.

I meet so many people that tell me they are ready to make a change in their life, but have no idea where to start. They may have more than one interest that is pulling them in different directions or they have found they have gotten so far off track, they are having a hard time identifying something they are passionate about.

Not only is this topic an important focus of life coaching, I believe it’s an essential part of health and wellness as well. Our passions feed our spirit. They give us joy, happiness, fulfillment and inspiration. They motivate us and give us something to look forward to in our day or week.

When passion is missing in our life, we look for that satisfaction and fulfillment in other places – food, alcohol, television, relationships and even work. All of these things are not “unhealthy” in themselves, but when they are used to numb our real feelings or ignore a larger issue, then they become unhealthy, sometimes to the point of addiction.

I’ve found over the years that at the root of most people’s eating or weight issues there is usually something deeper. The people that come to see me either already know this, or they don’t realize they are unhappy until we begin to work through the constructs they have designed to avoid dealing with their true feelings.

In both cases, what is often missing is a deeper sense of joy and fulfillment. This is something we cannot get from external sources. It comes from within, when we are connected to our passion and our authentic nature.

It’s important to remember that there is nothing wrong with you if you find yourself in this situation. Don’t beat yourself up for not having figured it out. This is part of the journey, part of your growth as a human being. In our society, very few of us have had the benefit as young children to witness healthy emotional behavior. We are often not taught how to express our feelings, or even recognize them.

Over several posts, I’m going to share with you some clues that will help you to narrow down and identify your passions. They are all around you. Your true self is always trying to steer you in the direction of joy and fulfillment, it’s a just a matter of learning how to notice the signs. These signs are almost always linked to your emotions.

So here’s clue #1: Pay attention to what or who you are jealous of.

We’ve been taught that jealousy is a negative emotion. But really all of our emotions are signs that something is coming up for us. Jealousy is a sign that there is something the other person has that we want – whether that be a lifestyle, a job, a good figure, a relationship, etc. The key is not to focus on the object of our jealousy and steam about how unfair life is. You have to use the emotional clue to notice that this is an issue for you and something you have to pay attention to. In order to have the thing you are jealous or envious of, you will have to do the work yourself. Understand that if this wasn’t personally connected to you in some way, you would not be jealous.

I will share with you my own example. When I was working in the corporate world, I was always noticing stories of entrepreneurs. People who left their jobs and followed their passion. They got to work on their own terms and do what they loved and get paid for it. I so wanted their life. I wasn’t however, jealous of successful CEO’s or lawyers or doctors or concert pianists. These things didn’t have an emotional charge for me. That is the key: emotional charge. This is one way that we know we are connecting to our true self. Any time emotions are involved, we need to notice them and watch for the clues.

The trick is not to stay focused on the emotion of jealousy. Notice what it is showing you and then let it go. If you want that life, thing, job etc., you have to realize that this person has done the work to get it. The process for taking action is more than I can get into in one post, but I hope that in noticing some of your feelings you will be able to start to identify some potential areas for you to look into. Journaling can be very helpful here.

Many people live their entire lives half-living. They run on autopilot, never taking the time to explore and honor who they are and what they came here to experience. If you’re at a place in your life right now where you feel a sense of frustration, or boredom, or desire for something different, honor that feeling and begin the process of self discovery. It may require a bit of effort (anything worth having always does), but the reward of living each day truly happy and fulfilled is so worth it.

Start paying attention to this first clue, and I’ll share more in the coming posts.

To your health and happiness,
Victoria

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My Shine experience and lessons learned

November 12, 2009

Last week I attended Ali Brown’s Shine event in Las Vegas from Nov 5-7. 
Ali Brown is a millionaire entrepreneur coach and CEO whose company recently reached the prestigious Inc 500 list of fastest growing private companies.   Her story is nothing short of inspiring.  I’ve had the pleasure of following her career for the past [...]

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Your thoughts create your reality

October 27, 2009

Some people find this concept a little New Age.  They immediately think of movies like The Secret and Law of Attraction.  However the power of thought is an idea that goes far being marketing gimmicks and “self help” talk.
As part of my practice, I work with thoughts and belief systems all the time.  It’s usually [...]

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What’s wrong with coffee?

October 15, 2009

The number one thing I hear when I meet with clients for the first time is “please don’t make me give up coffee!!”
As a former Starbucks “junkie” living on 2-3 venti size coffees per day, I don’t think there’s anyone that loves coffee more than I do. So I can definitely relate. [...]

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Simple ways to reduce your breast cancer risk

October 4, 2009

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month.  This is a cause that is very dear to my heart, as my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer twelve years ago.   I am happy and grateful to say that today she is healthy and cancer free.   She made a personal choice to pursue a holistic approach to her [...]

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Welcome!

September 27, 2009

Thank you for visiting my site and my blog, welcome!
In my introductory post I wanted to quickly introduce myself and describe my intention for this blog.  You can read by full bio and story here, but what I want you to know beyond my title and qualifications, is that I am just like you.
Often people [...]

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  • The greatest tragedy of life is not death. It’s what dies within us while we’re still alive. - Norman Cousins